Marc Cabrera has nothing better to do than watch a lot of movies and television, and listen to a lot of music. Luckily, he has a job that pays him to blog about local and national arts, entertainment and pop culture. He can be reached at email@example.com.
So my fantasy football season finished off last week, and I wound up a distant fourth place, well out of reach of any money but respectable enough to hope for a better season next year.
The end of the season has me feeling sad as I hand the commissioner my league dues, but it got me to thinking: who would be on my fantasy hip-hop team? What would the positions be, and who would my starting lineup be?
So, for your reading pleasure, here is my 2007 fantasy hip-hop lineup:
Mainstream MC - Eminem: My franchise player, a number one pick who can carry the team on his pale, narrow shoulders. Em may or may not release an album this year, but best believe his fantasy value would rival that of a Ladanian Tomlinson. Em's an all-purpose MC who brings skill, swagger, backstory and hustle to the table. Backup: Nas
Underground/Conscious MC - MC Zion: Oakland's finest is one of the most underrated in the game, and a late-round steal. He can work with his fellow underground stalworths (Aesop Rock, Grouch) or his native Oakland turf rappers (Balance, Mista FAB). He's got an ill voice that will get lots of finesse points and contribute steadily over the course of the rap season. Backup: Phonte of Little Brother.
Hustler/Rapper: T.I. - A top starter on any other team, T.I. runs the pivot as my hustle/rapper, aka trapper. The guy owns his own construction company, for crying out loud, when he's not dropping stellar 16s in the booth. T.I. is the flashy wide receiver who always gets fined for outlandish touchdown dance routines, but you can't argue with the results. Backup: Jay-Z
Gangsta Rapper: Brother Lynch Hung: On defense, you need someone who will scare the living bejesus out of the opposition. This Sac-Town veteran doesn't just write lyrics about bloody encounters with the living dead, he makes movies about it. One of the most morbid gangsta rappers on earth, period. Backup: The Game
Producer: Rick Rock - The Bay Area lieutenant has provided the music for everyone from E-40 to Jay-Z. His bomb squad meets Dre sound is not just the official boom bap for hyphy, but he is quickly becoming the Golden State's go-to-guy (Snoop enlisted Rick Rock for his latest album on the song "Candy"). He can coach the team to victory with his production skills. Backup: Hi-Tek.